


Volume Up!

by habitate



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, JYJ (Band), Kim Jaejoong (Musician)
Genre: I just wanted to finish this thing, M/M, Overall silliness, honestly, totally crude person named Jaejoong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-02
Updated: 2014-09-07
Packaged: 2018-02-15 21:16:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2243760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/habitate/pseuds/habitate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaejoong wants an angel all on his own. Too bad, Junsu's already taken.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Loud

The moment Junsu asked him to join in a fun activity on Sunday morning, Jaejoong should have followed his inner instincts and run.

There was absolutely no way Jaejoong could ever enjoy the same things Junsu did yet when he'd said ‘fun activities’ Jaejoong had been seriously drunk and it had sounded super seductive and he had always had this small crush on his best friend so why not give it a try...

‘This sucks’ he concluded when sitting on the hard bench at some football stadium he didn't know existed, watching several morons chasing after a ball at 7 o’clock in the morning.

His head was about to burst and his stamina was dangerously close to going into coma.

And then it started to rain.

Somehow Jaejoong had never seen the appeal of football and now, when he was watching it for real, he conclude there was absolutely nothing redeeming about this game of shit.

Sure, it made Junsu happy and he loved seeing Junsu happy but it stung to know that he could never compare to a fucking ball (although he had two on his own) and put such a happy expression on his friend's face.

‘Isn’t that Jaejoong my eyes see? Are they truly deceiving me or has there been witchcraft involved? Someone actually managed to get you out of that cave of yours in the wee hours of this glorious day?’

‘Shut up, Chun’ Jaejoong grumbled, giving the other the nastiest and the meanest look he could muster up and failed, all thanks to the sheer impossibility of looking anything else than an angered squirrel with a hangover.

‘I hate you’ he concluded yet accepted his defeat and the beer offered to him as some kind of peace offering. He opened the cheap can and devoured the absolutely disgusting liquid inside while Yoochun made himself as comfortable as he possibly could on the wet, firm bench.

‘You know- ’

Oh crap, Yoochun was in the mood to talk.

‘Junsu really appreciates you’

Bla bla bla was all he heard.

‘As a friend’ Jaejoong said in unison with Yoochun and shook his head.

‘Gosh, man, I get it’

Because not getting it would require him to be mentally challenged.

‘I know you both are going out and totally in love and yada yada yada all that shit and that he just wants to make sure that I am not left out because I am his precious childhood friend and he would never want to lose me but jeeesus do I not need this! I’ve been here since six, Yoochun, six! Do you know how many hours have I slept since- uh, forever!’

There was a bit of silence while Jaejoong chugged down the rest of the can and Yoochun waited.

‘I wish I knew! The last time I’ve seen my bed has been longer that I have seen you and you know how much I dislike seeing your smug face’

Yoochun felt like he had to say something in defense of his face but got interrupted by Junsu, all smiling and wet and looking like a dog just having spent an hour playing fetch in the ocean.

‘You’re like a baby seal’ Jaejoong grumbled in disapproval. Junsu looked at Yoochun who shrugged because his own face had just been categorized as smug and therefore not worthy of Jaejoong's attention.

‘Um, thanks. I guess’ Junsu smiled which made Jaejoong hate him so much more but also lose his terribly grumpy attitude.

‘It’s great to see you two getting along’

Overstatement of the fucking century.

‘Oh, but Jae, the real reason I wanted you to come out today was to introduce you to that friend I've been talking about. Remember? One of our top players and a totally awesome guy?’ Junsu was beaming with happiness so much that it made Jaejoong’s mood deflate once again.

So that’s what this was all about.

He sure was glad Junsu decided to introduce him to this super amazing guy when he looked his absolutely worst. Now when he thought back about it, Junsu had been talking about 'this guy’ for ages and had always fantasized something about the totally unrealistic scenario of the four of them having a double date because 'this guy' would totally be Jae’s type and if only they met they would instantly fall in love.

Heck no.

Jaejoong looked around theatrically before he exclaimed to the sky.

‘And where oh where have thou hidden this prince of mine?’ as, obviously, he was not feeling this love-at-the-first-glance scenario despite Junsu's unrealistic hopes and dreams.

‘There he comes!’ Junsu chirped and Jaejoong glanced over to the tall, dark and handsome nearing the small group and, ok, he had to admit that the guy was good looking.

He hadn’t been able to tell from afar if any of the players were any good but that's because he just didn't give a shit about guys at six o’clock in the morning. But this one wasn’t half as bad.

Fine, a bit of an understatement. The guy was gorgeous and totally his type.

‘Hey Junsu!’ the tall guy smiled and waved and, much to Jaejoong's surprise, his heart made a little leap.

‘Oh, and you must be that Jae’ the tone turned to disapproval and the smile disappeared the moment he looked him up and down and, wait just a moment, what was that supposed to mean?

Sure, he might not look his finest with that drunk I-haven’t-showered-for-a-week look, old stained shirt (but he hadn't vomited on this one so there you go), uncombed hair, unshaven face, sunken eyes and cheap can of beer in his hands but stiiiiil it was no reason to judge.

'Screw this’ he stood up and brushed past the stranger. He had had just about enough of everything and he just wanted to sleep.

\---

When he woke up it was late in the afternoon and he felt terrible. Not only did he still have a headache but now it had combined with unbearable guilt.

What kind of a friend was he that he made such a bad impression on somebody Junsu valued so much? He had looked like a homeless person and acted like a lady with a bad case of pms.

Junsu should hate him forever.

That, of course, was not going to happen. Junsu wouldn’t hate him but he sure would be disappointed. Who wouldn’t if their friend pulled such a stunt on them?

That said, Jaejoong followed the only reasonable conclusion and found his phone. It was time for a call.

‘Junsu, listen’

‘Yoochun’s listening’

Crap. The boyfriend had answered the phone.

'Ok then. Hey, Yoochun’

‘Hey’

‘Uh... can I talk to Junsu now?’

There was an awkward silence followed by a long ‘hmmmm’ before a ‘I don’t know' and 'Maybe?'

'He’s in a pretty bad mood right now. He thinks you hate him for dragging you out in the cold morning to watch his game and meet his friend. I think he’s contemplating suicide’

‘Heee? No way, cut that out’

‘No, truly, he looks thoroughly depressed, courtesy of you and your attitude. We had plans to go on a double date and Junsu made reservations at this nice place and now he doesn't even want anything to do with life as such. He hasn't moved from the TV in hours, watching and laughing at old reruns of gag shows which aren't even funny. I think you broke him’

‘Bullshit, that can’t be true’ Jaejoong laughed nervously and his hand shot to the back of his head, picking at the loose strands there.

'I swear it is'

Oh. Ok.

'Then, umh, you tell him, well, tell him that I will go out with that friend of his if it’s really that important and we can have that double date and everything, ok? I mean, I wasn't in my right mind this morning. I mean, I had a headache and everything! Really-’

‘Junsu, he agreed!’ there was a yell from the other end which left Jaejoong fully confused before a cheerful, completely undepressed voice replaced the calm tone of Yoochun.

‘I’m so glad you agreed!’ Junsu’s enthusiasm sounded almost painfully sickening to Jaejoong’s hurting head and empty stomach.

‘Wait for us at the Bum’s at seven. Seven in the evening, that is’ he cheerfully specified as if Jaejoong really needed the information to be dumbgraded for him.

‘Fucker’ was the only thing he managed before the line went dead.

Exhausted, Jaejoong fell back into his bed, staring at the ceiling in denial that this had just happened.

There was, indeed, no greater master in guilt tripping him than Yoochun was. And what annoyed him most was that Junsu was just too eager to go along with it.

\---

When he arrived at their meeting place it was already twenty past seven and he was late.

It had stopped raining earlier so he had opted for leaving his umbrella at home. Then it started raining ten minutes into his walk and he felt like an idiot. He'd spent the rest of it running and hiding beneath various objects just to avoid getting soaked.

He hadn’t succeeded and his wet-dog impression really pained him as he had actually taken the time and effort to make himself presentable this time. He had even styled his hair! Not that it mattered now when all that was left of it was a wet mess around his face.

‘Now what’ Jaejoong mumbled as he looked around and didn’t locate anyone familiar. There wasn’t any use in loitering around so he followed the same logic as before and fished his bag for his mobile phone.

He would call and apologize for being late and then go home and hopefully die of pneumonia.

He barely managed to get his cell out when the rain stopped and his view was blocked by a tall figure.

Slightly intimidated he looked up and almost dropped his bag when realizing that it was the stranger from the morning standing in front of him, holding an umbrella over his head.

‘Hey’

\---

‘Oh man, this is the oldest trick in the book and we fell for it. They seriously set us up like this’ Jaejoong glared out of the window, thinking about all the painful way of how to skin a person.

They were sitting in a small cafe where they had found refuge from the pouring rain. His hair was still damp but he hardly cared about that anymore. He was way too busy seething with rage over Yoochun’s evil plans and the corruption of his sweet innocent Junsu.

‘You look... different’ commented the stranger, catching Jaejoong's attention.

‘Uh, what?’

‘You look different now from how you looked in the morning’ the other gave him a more elaborate explanation to which Jaejoong only shrugged.

‘Yes, well, I guess I’m not drunk off my ass and I have slept more than ten minutes in two days combined so...'

What else was there to say? This guy had obviously formed his opinion on him being some kind of a bum who slept in other people's attics and explored trash cans for the living.

‘You’re actually beautiful’

Or maybe not.

‘Thanks?’

The stranger reached over the table and brushed Jaejoong’s wet bangs from his face. His fingers lingered on his face longer than necessary just like his gaze lasted, slowly burning painful holes in Jaejoong's heart.

‘So then-’ any attempts at a smooth conversation were lost when Jaejoong looked at him an deadpanned ‘-what’s your name again?’ 

 

tbc

 

A/N: I think there hasn't been a story of mine where Jaejoong isn't a raging alcoholic. Weird. I should stop that. 


	2. Louder

'But JAE, you just don’t ask a question like that during the first date. It’s so disrespectful and totally unromantic’

If it weren't for his beloved Junsu talking, he would have bashed the bastard’s face in.

‘Yeah, you’re so rude. It’s like you were raised by the wolves’

Yoochun, on the other hand, was not his beloved Junsu so he hadn't the same reservations regarding this guy. If needed he was more than willing to rip Yoochun a new one.

‘You have no manners’

‘And you talk with your mouth full’

'You have no shame'

'And dress like a prostitute on budget'

‘So after all our efforts...’

‘-no wonder you’re still single’

Yes, that much was true. Jaejoong had been boyfriend-less for an eternity now. How could someone with a face like his manage to do that was beyond Jaejoong's understanding but still- did these two have to attack him in their perfect tandem?

‘Maybe if he shut his mouth the problem would be solved?’ Yoochun suggested and Junsu looked at him like some kind of a new-age messiah.

‘Screw you, fuckers’ Jaejoong mumbled, now feeling extra peeved.

How these two had managed to drag him out of his apartment after yesterday’s disaster he didn't know, but there he was, sitting at a disgustingly optimistic lake watching some disgustingly optimistic swans swimming in some disgustingly optimistic water.

Wonderful.

‘I guess we’re not going to hear from Changmin anymore’ Yoochun said what the other two were thinking and all three of them sighed in unison.

So yes, Jaejoong’s date had been a disaster. He reasoned it was because of his stupid question at the beginning as everything had gone downhill from there.

He shouldn’t have done that, probably should have listened more carefully when Junsu had gone on and on about the guy for months. But, as destiny had set, there was not an ounce of chemistry between them both despite Changmin being Jaejoong's type.

The guy was smart and witty and really good looking but he was also too young and too much of a smartass. Or maybe it was because Jaejoong was too crude?

Honest, he thought, that's the word I'm looking for

If anything, they had developed a difficult family problem rather than that the blooming love affair Junsu had imagined. What he hoped for was that from this day onwards Changmin would avoid him like the plague because he didn't even want to remember.

‘So much for your awesome deduction skills, Junsu. You truly find the best of ‘em’

Nothing seemed to lift Jaejoong's mood today. This was, after all, how most of his dates ended. At first things were going great and expectations were high but the moment he opened his mouth the illusion was shattered.

‘It’s just that my face doesn’t match my personality’ he sighed like he was to breathe his last breath and stood up. He had enough of this annoyingly happy park with all those dovey-eyed couples and Junsu and Yoochun in the middle of it.

Lately he couldn’t stand being around the two, feeling like he might end strangling one of them if pushed to his limits.

If only his lovely Junsu would leave that undeserving Chunface and come into his awaiting arms.

They were a match made in heaven, destined to be forever and ever and all that stuff if only Junsu realized that Jaejoong was his destined one.

Any day now. He could wait.

No one knew him like Junsu did. He knew and he understood. He didn’t treat him like a prince only to discover that he was the evil step-mother instead.

How was this his fault that he enjoyed drinking and staying out late and maybe pigging out and laughing too loudly at unfunny things?

‘Where you're off to?’ Junsu asked when Jaejoong stood up. Not feeling like answering he brushed the question off with a wave of his hand and headed for the gate.

\---

Despite all odds Jaejoong decided to go out that evening.

It wasn’t good for his heart, stomach, liver or sanity nor did he want to go for a one-night stand but he also didn’t feel like tagging along the dream couple or staying home alone.

The life of the lone wolf was the life he had chosen to follow from now on which meant no more friends, no more happiness.

The music was blasting his brains out and he was filling up on drinks those some plain-looking guy was supplying when a strange creature entered the bar, catching everyone's attention.

People like him never went to shady bars like this, not without a good reason.

The guy with his designer suit and silk tie and gold watch and polished shoes and neat hair and super-handsome face and absolutely superior physique was totally out of everyone’s league, but it was fun to dream.

Usually, these types came here to look for someone - a sister, a brother, an underaged child or an inappropriately dressed older relative in the worst case scenario. Whatever it was it didn't concern Jaejoong so he returned to chatting with his plain-faced companion.

Mr. handsome scanned the room with an intense gaze until his eyes found what he was looking for and ‘Uh, Jae, I think-’ the bartender, which he had come to known as the thoughtest guy around, stuttered at him while haislity pointing his finger at something behind.

‘What?’ Jaejoong rolled his eyes and turned, half expecting to meet some drunk bastard wanting to pick a fight with him but was faced with the Golden Adonis from before instead.

From the looks of it, whoever the stranger had been looking for, was either similar or had something to do with Jaejoong.

The tall and handsome looked down at him with a disapproving scowl before asking in a strict voice.

‘Are you Jaejoong?’

The words were uttered with such authority that for a moment Jaejoong considered lying before stopping himself from doing something so foolish. There was no use in pretending to be someone else because nobody else could ever be him.

Ready for whatever trouble he had managed to get himself into this time, he nodded.

The next thing he knew was being dragged out of the bar and left shivering in the cold air while his jacket was still hanging on the stool back in the warm club he missed already. In the presence of the stranger he felt like a small child who had misbehaved.

‘I shall tell you that I highly disapprove of your behaviour and I hadn't expected to find you in such a dirty establishment’

Hello, what? Was this his mom in disguise? What a wicked idea but he hoped that wasn't true. Umma wasn't that tall...

‘Um, I’m not sure what you-’ he tried to explain but the other interrupted him, acting as if he had been born to lecture Jaejoong.

‘And what kind of clothes are those? I expect you to be dressed with the utmost elegance and style, not in such rags’

Now, wait, hold that thought. Insulting his personality was fine but his clothes? That was too much. This guy was taking it one step too far.

‘From this day on I expect nothing but respectable appearance or I will absolutely not allow you to date my brother’

No. Noooo. No friggin way. This had to be someone's super straight brother, worried about the family name or something equally trivial and acting like the world owed him one. This had nothing to do with Jaejoong.

'Ok. Seriously. Stop’ he put his hands in front of himself in defense and took a deep breath, ‘listen to me well-’ this was going to be a pain to explain.

‘Whomever you have mistaken me for or whomever you believe me to be I am not that person. Got that? Great'

He took another deep breath, 'You see, I am NOT currently dating anyone and even if I were I would stop just to avoid the trouble of dealing with someone as stuck-up and close-minded as you are. You obviously have got you nose up your own ass and don't even know it smells’

You go, girl, Jaejoong cheered himself on for being so strong and independent.

The stranger seemed to be taken aback at the sudden attack but managed to recover surprisingly well, this time talking in a calmer manner.

‘So you are not in a relationship with my brother Changmin?’

‘Oh god no. Definitely no’

‘What a relief’

The look of absolute ecstasy on the stranger’s face pissed Jaejoong off and he frowned. Was he really the lowest of the low? What had he done so terrible to deserve being treated like this?

Fucking bastard.

'Yeah, nice for you and everything but I’m freezing my ass out here so if you have finished your gloating I'll just head back to join the rest of my lowlife friends'

He could feel some tears stinging his eyes which was shocking because he had thought himself strong enough. He had gotten used to the rude comments and insults people threw at him but something about the absolute relief on the man's face hurt him more than all the ugly words combined.

The stranger turned from ecstatic to confused and at least that made Jaejoong feel something similar to satisfaction.

Had he thought that people like him couldn't be hurt?

He choked out a chuckled to stop the sob from escaping and turned to leave.

‘No, please, I must apologize' a firm hand on his shoulder stopped him. Oh gosh, could these white collars with their feeling of superiority ever live a moment without shoving their pretentious kindness in everyone's face?

'Let me buy you dinner’

But then again, they usually didn't offer to buy him dinner. Jaejoong turned around, intrigued.

‘And I’m terribly sorry for not introducing myself earlier. My name’s Jung Yunho’

The man smiled what seemed like a honest to god smile and extended his arm for a handshake.

For the first time that evening Jaejoong didn't feel so cold anymore.

\---

‘So it’s a date!’ Junsu chirped as he busied himself around the small apartment.

It was quite the pitiful place to live, suited only for the most hardcore of bachelors. But it was somewhere to sleep and it was cheap which was great for Jaejoong who barely made the ends meet after wasting all his money on clubbing.

‘It’s not a date’ he grumbled in return while watching the other pick a shirt out of the pile of unrecognizable things.

He was bad at laundry, so what? Junsu sometimes came over and took care of the situation. Why couldn’t his cute angel fall for him instead?

‘So when’s the date?’

‘Uh-’ so hopeless, ‘I don’t know and it's not really a-‘

Junsu gave him a dirty look.

'Six. In the evening. Friday’

‘Excellent’ there was a strange determination in his friend’s voice, ‘that gives us three more days to make a civilized person out of you’

As much as Jaejoong wished for that to happen, it was, sadly, impossible.

‘What do you mean by making a ci- ci—whatever the word was - person out of me?’

‘I think you managed to illustrate my point perfectly just now’

Junsu stood up and brushed some dirt off his clothes. He moved fast, with such speed and grace that Jaejoong realized that something was wrong only when he found himself pinned against the nearby wall.

‘Do you want to find a man for yourself or not?’

Ow. Junsu had turned into a maniac and it was all Yoochun's fault.

‘No hesitating, Jae, you must be ready, you must fight and you must be ready to fight!’

Or he was doing drugs. The judgement was still out in the open.

‘I’m tired of seeing you wasting yourself on people who don't deserve you,' Junsu's eyes had turned soft and all shiny and Jaejoong could barely resist the urge to kiss him.

'Be a someone finally, I believe in you’

More than I will ever believe in myself, angel Jaejoong smiled and patted his friend’s round cheek instead.

So cute. So innocent. It was good that he had Chunny on his side as someone like him wouldn’t survive in the real world on his own.

‘Ok ok’ Jaejoong gave in if that made his friend happy, ‘as you wish, master’

Junsu’s eyes lit up strangely and his innocent wide-eyed face twisted into a much darker and sinful expression.

Jaejoong shuddered.

Had he been wrong in assuming that Yoochun was the corrupted one?

\---

‘Don’t talk with your mouth full!’ Junsu yelled at him the moment he tried to get a word in their terribly stiff conversation.

Yoochun was standing beside the table as their acting waiter and Jaejoong had to admit that he was pretty amazing at serving people.

That thought made him chuckle which earned him another disapproving look from Junsu.

They had been at his ‘manner training’ for two days now and if Jaejoong had been excited at first he was bitterly disappointed by now.

First, Junsu shared his place with Yoochun and he'd seen the bedroom- only one bed.

Second, Junsu was a terrible host.

‘I just wanted to tell you that-’

‘Don’t!’ Junsu shot down the reasoning without even giving him a chance to reason.

'But-'

‘Jae, just- don’t’

‘Don’t what?’

‘Talk’

‘But what should I do instead?’

‘Smile’

‘And?’

‘And nod when asked a question’

Smile and nod? He could do that.

No, wait. This was getting ridiculous. Or maybe this was not getting ridiculous and had been full on retarded from the very start. It’s not like he was even going on a date or anything. It was just an apology, an act of pretensious kindness. That Yunho guy probably didn't even remember his name.

‘Now you’re just torturing me’ Jaejoong shook his head, leaning his chin on the back of his palm.

The strange gleam in Junsu's eyes returned.

‘Shut up and look pretty, that's the one thing you excel at. We're having a civilized conversation here and whining doesn't belong at the table’

‘But Su! What am I, a dog?’

‘If that’s what your master wishes’

The creepy look on Junsu’s face spread and Jaejoong shuddered. Unwillingly, his mind slipped in that dangerous territory where he knew exactly the reason Yoochun was so good at serving.

 

 

A/N: I feel like puking. Ate too much nuts *insert other significant information here* Thanks for reading! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still alcoholic. 
> 
>  
> 
> Yeah...


	3. Super Bass

Giving the restaurant a very long and a very dubious look, Jaejoong groaned.

He felt like he was walking in someone else’s shoes which in this case was not far from truth as these were Yoochun’s shoes he was wearing.

What was he so worried about? It’s not like this was a date. It was a dinner courtesy of him being pathetic and almost crying in front of a stranger. There was nothing more to it. There would be no regrets and no sorrow because there was nothing to expect.

‘Try answering only the things you’re asked about’

‘But-’

‘Yoochun’s prepared a list of topics you can discuss’

‘Seriously?’

‘Whatever happens- smile!’

‘My cheeks hurt'

‘Go go go!’

And with that Junsu had shoved him out of the house and into the taxi.

‘Don’t come back today!’

How could that be encouraging? Junsu had no shame.

Jaejoong looked at his phone and groaned. He had arrived early and as a rule he never arrived early. His pride as a man depended on him being late but, then again, he had no pride as a man so he couldn't lose anything even if he broke his own rules.

What worried him more was that Yunho may get the wrong idea and think he was trying too hard.

Sure, he was wearing his best shirt and those were Yoochun’s designer shoes and then there was Junsu’s new jacket which was a bit too tight in the shoulders and a bit too loose around his waist...

Oh, who was he kidding? Yunho couldn't possibly not get the wrong idea because every idea of him was wrong. Jaejoong looked ready to marry.

Curse you Junsu and your that-is-not-an-outfit-you-can-wear-on-a-proper-date. This isn't even a date!

A minute passed and then another one and after having idled around for twenty more minutes Jaejoong wondered if maybe his date was not going to show up. Not that this was a date or anything or that he would be disappointed ...or anything. It was no big deal, even if Yunho didn't show up.

Twenty five minutes in total and Jaejoong had lost hope.

He would never trust people again. The life of the lone wolf was the life for him. He were to die alone and a lone snail would come to crawl on his grave every rainy day and- he spotted his handsome date rushing towards him and his mind drew a blank.

Yunho was fucking gorgeous while Jaejoong tried his best not to drool.

The taller skid to stop in front of him, completely out of breath, and looked up at him with a 'Ah, I’m sorry! I'm so so sorry. I hope you didn’t have to wait for long’

With that, everything was forgiven.

I was here early, moron, what are you apologizing for? was what Jaejoong would have normally said but then he remembered Junsu and his inhuman training and smiled instead, politely shaking his head.

‘Oh, no. It’s such a nice weather today’

'Weather's always a great conversation starter!' Junsu had sworn on his life while stuffing Jaejoong in his new jacket, ‘don’t think about it too much, just say it out loud and it will sound natural'

Yes. Very natural. Yunho’s confused face was a testament on how natural this was. Luckily, his I-totally-wish-but-he's-not-my-date wasn't easily shaken and snapped back to his confident self almost instantly, the confusion from his face gone.

Yunho was one quick fellow and Jaejoong liked that in a man.

‘Yes, yes, indeed, the weather is wonderful today. Maybe we should take a walk before we eat then?’

Shit

This was not part of the plan.

Jaejoong had an entire essay on topics he could talk about during dinner and things he had to comment on while at a table but he drew a complete blank when it came to walks in the parks. This was unfamiliar territory and totally out of question but how could he refuse without seeming rude? By Junsu's standarts all he had to do was smile so...

Jaejoong's smiled.

Having received no answer, Yunho scratched the back of his head and waited for a bit longer. Maybe the other hadn't understood?

‘Well, there’s a park nearby-’

I know, dumbass, Jaejoong kept smiling.

‘So we can go there’

No

And so they went, Jaejoong smiling like the expression had been surgically operated on his face all while panicking on the inside.

What now? Maybe he could call Junsu and ask for advice?

‘I really have to apologize for my behavior the other day’

But as long as Yunho was to one talking it would be alright.

‘-you see, I was taking my usual route home but then I spotted Changmin talking to someone. He’s a really difficult kid for his age and he never tells me anything so I'm always worried about everything. I have to apologize in advance but I gathered some information on you’

Ok, so his not-date had turned into a stalker. This was fine, totally fine, but why weren't there any people in this perfect-for-a-murder-scene park?

'You must find me weird, I’m sure-’

You bet

‘Noooooo, not at all’

‘-but I just want to have a bigger part in my brother’s life. We’ve been drifting apart these past few months and I wondered if there was something he’s been hiding from me or was afraid to talk about. I thought that maybe because I've been gay for all my life my brother was ashamed of me and didn't want to talk about relationships so I asked some of his friends in the football team-’

Damn you, Junsu, have you been telling my secrets to strange people?

'I was very surprised when I got to know about him trying to date a guy. I guess he's in this experimental phase because he's never shown interested before...I had not intended to bother you, though, so you must understand’

Jaejoong's mind was slowly drifting apart just like Yunho from his brother because that was one huge wall of text to process. He was tiring from all the smiling and nodding and Yunho's talking because, boy, did Yunho love to talk.

‘The next evening I was working late again so when I was on my way home I spotted you in that club and all of sudden something snapped and I forgot all about my manners or my common sense and just rushed there. I just- I was afraid you would hurt Changmin’

Aaaand here comes the brother complex. 

‘And I felt so relieved when I discovered that the two of you were not going out’

Charming

‘But don't misunderstand, please. It's not because I think you’re a bad person that I felt relieved. I’m so sorry if you have come to think that of me. What I meant was that I felt glad that you were not seeing anyone and- I just wanted to apologize. I hope that doesn’t make me seem like a really weird person-’

No, not at all

'But- you’re so quiet today. Is anything wrong?’

Right... Riiight.

Speaking. He had to say something in response.

‘It’s- wonderful weather today?’

This time Yunho looked at him as if he had lost his mind and that was the exact moment Jaejoong knew he had screwed up good.

Think!

There had to be something else to talk about beside the weather, right?

Think, Jaejoong, think!

They were in a park so he could talk about park things. What was the most natural thing that a park had? Trees.

'The trees are green’

Best observation ever, genius

‘And the grass-’

Now he was just getting silly.

'-is also green'

Jaejoong looked at Yunho's face of disbelief and he felt like crying. He was no good at talking and he was even worse at keeping quiet. He opened his mouth to say something but had already lost track of whatever he had wanted to say first so he just shut up, smiling and nodding instead.

God are these shoes uncomfortable

‘Uh,’ even Yunho couldn't recover from the spurs of an authentic idiot that fast, ‘maybe we should go back to the restaurant then? You must be hungry’

Jaejoong's eyes lit up because maybe he could show off his manners at the restaurant. But then again, if he sounded too eager it would make him seem like a hungry fool who was only after the free food.

‘No’ he deadpanned with a straight face.

That didn't sound much better.

‘Thank you’ he added as it that was going to fix everything.

From the looks of it, that didn't fix Yunho's permanently confused face. The guy rubbed at his forehead, looking around for help and searching for some kind of salvation. Something wasn't working here and Jaejoong bit his lip in frustration. He liked Yunho a lot and he wanted to be noticed but nothing worked. Why was this turning into something even worse than his regular dates?  

But of course! This isn't a date!

There it was, his clear answer. If this wasn't a date he didn't need to impress Yunho. And why the heck would he even listen to Junsu and especially Yoochun?

Screw this

‘No, actually, yes. Whatever. Let’s go eat’ he grabbed Yunho’s hand, taking pity on the confused man, and dragged him off to a nearby food stand.

Noodles were much more to his taste than the fancy restaurant Yunho had picked out.

‘You can buy me dinner and I will accept your apology’ he said with mischief dancing in his eyes, ‘but only if I get the biggest meal there is’

Whatever Yunho had been thinking so far was lost, and the confusion disappeared from his face, it blooming into a completely disarming smile instead.

‘I’ll be honored to do that’

\---

They were sitting at the canal, watching people and eating snacks.

Strangers passed them by and awkward conversations had been avoided for several hours.

‘That one's a pervert’ Jaejoong commented as he pointed to an elderly man with a young girl by his side.

‘Oh, come on, that's a completely normal family. You don't even know them, she could be his daughter’ Yunho bumped Jaejoong's arm, shaking his head in disapproval ‘your brain works in mysterious ways'

'And you're too innocent,' Jaejoong sneered when the couple started sucking face, 'no man kisses his daughter like that’

Yunho put his hands up in defeat, laughing heartily. Before he had managed to add anything, Jaejoong was already pointing in another direction, this time targeting a young woman standing under a tree, impatiently watching the clock.

‘She must be waiting for her lover and he's running late and she's worried that her husband will discover her affair’

At that Yunho just rolled his eyes, scooting closer. His leg bumped against the other's and the heat from Jaejoong's body seeped into his own. He had enough of this people-watching.

‘Ok then, genius. How about me? Care to evaluate?’

Jaejoong turned his head, surprised at the sudden closeness.

Yunho was gorgeous up close and he made him feel dizzy and light-headed and suddenly nervous.

‘Uh, well, I don't know. It's not a good idea’

‘Why?’

‘I may end up offending you’

Like I usually do

Yunho shook his head, loose bangs falling on his forehead, causing a restless itch in Jaejoong's fingers asking him to reach over and thread through the soft hair.

‘Impossible. You cannot offend me’

With a sad smile Jaejoong looked away. That’s what they all said but once they got to know him better they changed their minds. They all said he was too difficult to deal with- besides, this was no date.

‘You’re saying those things just because you don't know me. Everyone gets offended at something’

Yunho shrugged, seemingly indifferent to the comment.

‘Ok, fine, that may be true. Then, can I say what I have observed about you?’

‘Uh’ was this really a good idea? ‘sure’

‘Well then,’ Yunho grabbed Jaejoong's face and turned it towards himself. He was holding onto Jaejoong's shoulder with his other arm and Woah he was way too close.

‘I see this handsome, no, more than that... I see this absolutely stunning guy inside and out who is funny and easy-going and is so afraid of speaking his mind that he makes a fool out of himself more times than not. I see this amazingly beautiful human being who's trying so hard to please everyone that he ends up pleasing nobody'

Jaejoong's eyes widened. What? What was going on? Had his fairy godmother finally risen from the grave and sent him his goddamned prince charming? Because he was charmed. This was charming and Yunho's face was so close he could feel the breathe on his lips.

'I see you, Kim Jaejoong. A guy who doesn’t realize that if people cannot appreciate him for who he is, it’s their problem and not his. Maybe he’s lonely and maybe he doesn’t let people close but hopefully he hasn’t found that one person who can see past all his nonsense. You know why? Because that person would never let him go’ and with that Yunho smiled full-heartedly, his hand retreating from the other's face.

‘How was it?’

‘Woah, maaaan-’

Jaejoong was out of words. Nobody had ever said anything close to that. Best he'd ever gotten was something like 'you're so fucking pretty' muttered in the heat of the moment but this was of a completely different caliber. Yunho was on a completely different caliber than anyone he had ever met. Was he even human?

‘Maaaan. That was-’ he wanted to say amazing and inspiring and I want to spend the rest of my life with you but all that came out was- ‘lame’

He couldn't. He just couldn't. As amazing as the speech had been it was also so. fucking. cheesy.

Much to his surprise Yunho laughed and Jaejoong could't help laughing with him. They must have looked like two idiots and Jaejoong wanted to throw himself in the river but Yunho seemed unbothered and that was all that mattered.

\---

It was getting late, the evening sky colouring red, and Jaejoong felt like he had never lived before. His heart was full and heavy and he could barely breathe.

An apology

This was just an apology. There was nothing more to it. There would be no sorrow and no disappointment if he never expected anything.

They were standing on a small bridge, watching the sun go down and for a moment longer he could ignore the reality and pretend that he was in a romantic yet heart -breaking drama.

‘So-’

Then Yunho opened his mouth saying the words Jaejoong feared.

‘-I hope you had a good evening’

Why could he never shut that big trap?

Guess that’s where this all ends

If he could spend a bit more time with this amazing, amazing human being maybe he could change and maybe he could become a better person because of him-

Just let it go, Jae, don’t get your hopes up. Deal with this like a man or you will get hurt 

‘Sure. It was totally cool, man’ 

Was there really not an ounce of romance in him? Couldn’t he have said that this was the best time he’s spent with somebody in ages and that only Junsu had managed to make him so happy and giddy before? Couldn’t he beg for another evening like this? Begging wasn't all that bad, right? Couldn't he say anything at all? 

‘Here’ 

Jaejoong blinked and was given a small card, his fingers burning from the brush of Yunho's fingers against his own. He examined the paper carefully and it appeared to be some kind of a business card. 

‘And this is?’ 

‘Well-’ for the first time since he met the man, Yunho seemed hesitant, his hand fidgeting with the buttons of his jacket, ‘there’s my phone number on it so if you feel like it-’ 

Oh. No way. Jaejoong's heart started to race. 

‘Maybe you could call me sometimes and we could, you know-’ 

If this was a horse race, his heart was the winner. 

‘-go on a proper date or something?’ 

Ding-ding-ding. He could hear wedding bells ringing and doves flying off in the clouds. 

'What do you say?' Yunho looked at him with those irresistible eyes and all Jaejoong could think was how much he wanted to belong to this man completely and forever and ever till the eternity of time. He opened his mouth to say that he wanted that more than anything and that this had been everything but all that came out instead was- 

'Sure, man. That would be cool' 

\---

Two figures were lying on the bed, a thick darkness surrounding them. 

‘Junnie, you're sleeping?’ one of them asked, his voice small. There was silence, then a faint sound of someone turning around. 

‘Yes, Chunny, I was’ 

‘Oh’

Some more silence. 

‘Do you think the date went well?’ 

‘Yes, Chun, I think it went well’ 

The answer was not immediate but it came eventually. For good five minutes things were calm again. 

‘Do you think Jaejoong can fall in love, Su?’ 

There was a quiet chuckle. 

‘Love? Knowing Jae? Probably not but you never know, maybe there will be a miracle. Now sleep, honey’ 

This time it took about ten minutes for the silence to be interrupted. 

‘Junnie? But maybe you could- you know- uncuff me now, please?’ 

It seemed like nobody was going to answer this one until Junsu's wicked voice rang clear in the darkness.

‘No, Chunny,’ there was some more tossing and turning before it became completely still, ‘and if you don’t stop talking I will put the gag back in’ 

\--- 

The End 

Extra: 

After coming home Jaejoong felt like flying. Such a gorgeous guy had asked him out so maybe there was hope for everyone. He turned round and round on his heel until he felt dizzy and fell onto his bed, grabbing the pillow and squeezing it tightly. 

What was this feeling? Was it love? Was it? He sure was acting like a freaking teenage girl so it had to be. Just thinking about Yunho made his blood boil and his body shiver and all he could think was how much he wanted to touch him. 

‘Yuuuno’ Jaejoong sighed and closed his eyes, wanting to feel those beautiful hands all over his body and that mouth, oh, his mouth ... 

But wait. 

Jaejoong's eyes flew open and he sat up. Wasn’t Changmin Yunho's brother? Didn’t he tell him he’s a snob and a stuck up motherfucker during their first and only date? Didn’t Changmin wish him eternal damnation and swear to be his life-long nemesis and make his life a living hell if they ever met again? 

Yes, yes, he could clearly remember all those things happening in a very heated discussion not that long time ago. Oh well. 

‘Just my luck’ Jaejoong sighed and punched his pillow, ‘but you just wait, Changmin, you just wait’ 

Whatever brother complex he would have to deal with in the future, he was going to beat it down like a man. Like a man who was not afraid to beg and cry and whine if necessary.

 

A/N: If you think Jaejoong is really stupid in this story... well, to put it kindly, he probably dropped out of the kindergarten so... Well, and this is the end of this story but I will continuation with more or less the same in a different story only, uh, more dramatic? Eh, whatever.     

**Author's Note:**

> In every story that I write Jaejoong is a raging alcoholic. 
> 
> Yunjae ship will be the end of me. I hate it but I also love it. It's a real struggle.


End file.
